If you have had an unhappy break up with your ex, you are probably trying to figure out how to get back with your ex. As you think over what went wrong, keep in mind that getting over a highly emotional relationship with someone you were deeply in love with, can be very difficult. You may begin to wonder how you can make things different, should your ex return. You may also want to become a better person for your ex in the future, which all in all, might not be such a bad idea. However, if your ex made you feel less than, through criticisms and demeaning you constantly, then bringing back the ex might not be such a good idea.
If you have been detrimental to the relationship because of poor behavior, the first thing to do is apologize. If after being away from your ex for a period of time and you realize how great he/she was, then you need to let them know this. Ultimately, all people want to be appreciated and acknowledged. Apologizing to your ex tells them that you recognize your wrong-doings within the relationship. Let them know that you are sincerely sorry for your part in destroying the relationship. Only then, can true healing begin for you and your ex partner.
If your ex’s behavior was the reason for the breakup, learning how to forgive and forget is critical. While it is not easy to do, it is important for mending a broken relationship. Keep in mind, when you forgive and forget your ex partner, that you might want to discuss with your ex partner, your true feelings and how the event was disrespectful to the sanctity of the relationship. Helping your ex partner understand that it was not just about the act, but the disrespect that was shown to you within the relationship, will help your ex partner see clearly why they should not repeat what was done.
After getting back together, show your partner that reconciliation through being able to forgive, forget and start fresh is a possibility. Let them see the person they fell in love with. Start with effective communication, through finding out what is important to your partner. Bring out the more affectionate you, by leaving notes, poems, letters and other forms of affection. Always take the time to listen to your partner, even if you have to opt to agree to disagree.
Remember, to always make the extra effort to keep the relationship on the right track. Be expressive to your partner, asking their opinion, to show that they are valued in the relationship. Using the right tools within a relationship, will not only help you see how to get back together, but will keep you in a healthy and loving relationship for the future.
Also, keep in mind that the phase of the honeymoon period may have worn off, but understanding how important your ex partner was and still is within your life, will help your ex feel significant and loved within the relationship. When you have broken up with your ex, try these proven techniques to show you how to get back with your ex, and bring about a strong and healthy bond within the relationship that will be difficult to break in the future.
Great post! But I still have trouble with the idea of “absence makes the hearts grow fonder.”
Good luck.
Hi, I’m a relationship counselor and this is a great post. If you are looking for more contributions for your blog like this one, maybe I could write something for you? I have a message for people at all levels of society.
Many thanks!
That’s so true! To find Mr/Ms Right, you have to let go of the ones who think you are Mr/Ms Wrong, no matter how you feel about them. It’s tough, but move on!
I had a LDR and when we met the first time it did not go well. We already knew each other online and in phone calls for 3 months, but we were shy and did not make a good connection when we met up. Now she isn’t answering my messages. But I still love her. We just need to get to know each other. What can I do?
Annette, I would just send him a friendly text like “how are you” and see if he suggests meeting up.
thanks to jai mata for her miracles and restoring my marriage
“Learning to forgive and forget is critical”
This. If you get back with an ex, it has to be a fresh start, almost like you never knew each other before. If you bring all the old baggage along, all the old problems will repeat.
I want to get back with my ex but she moved out of town. Should I follow?
Wow. Many thanks for sharing this checklist with us, I have been searching for a thing similar to this to get a though.
But I like face book. Its depends on us how we use soacil site for our betterment or for soacil connecting or for masti or for killing our relations. So use it according your moto.
But Facebook can be a real bummer when you have an ex you want to get back with. Either they unfriend you, or you see all kinds of stuff they are doing that just makes the pain worse. I say stay away. In fact, unfriend them before they unfriend you 🙂